surprise me Lord!

2005-05-25T15:13:00.000-05:00

turnizzle, looking good!

2005-05-25T15:06:00.000-05:00

zabdi, me, puppy and karin in Mexico!

2005-05-25T14:53:00.000-05:00

elise, steff and me @ luther dell

2005-05-25T14:48:00.000-05:00

camp staff last year!

sweet God thing...

2005-05-25T14:20:00.000-05:00

So like two seconds after i posted, the song "Meet With Me" came on. That was huge, cause I was feeling very much like I was getting the silent treatment from the Lord. Stupid, I know, but true story. And after spilling my guts, Danielle (YAY!) im'd me and asked how I was, and I said I was mildly freaking out about stuff (stuff being camp dates, Mexico, Houser, God being salty at me, my job, all my junk in here...), and then the song came on. HAHAHA, and now "Indescribeable" came on!! I'm going to go have a moment. Blessings!!

time for summer!

2005-05-25T14:00:00.000-05:00

i know it's been awhile, but I've got an excuse this time - I've been in Norway! We went with the Augsburg concert band on tour in Norway and Iceland. It was amazing - I am so sheltered from stuff! Like beauteous landscapes, and foreign language, and expensiveness... seriously, stuff there was so much! Like a cup of coffee is $5-6, a happy meal was $7, t-shirts were like $30... yeah. Uber expensive. I'm back at home now, and it's crazy as ever! My stuff from college is just exploded all over my room - it's so full!! I hate that. It's just a mess! I don't even know where to start in the sorting process. And as soon as I sort, I'll have to repack for camp! HOLLA!!!! I am so excited. I feel like I haven't had time to be excited for camp yet. But now I've got a little time to think about it, and start to get pumped. Prayer request #1: I'm not sure what I want to do w/these kids this summer, as far as bible studies go. I feel like last year I was so convicted of a message I wanted to give them. So far, I've got nothing. God's been pretty quiet lately. We talked about it last night, and man, I am just longing to hear His sweet voice.

I'm not sure what to do w/this blog. The surprise experiment w/church is over (technically anyway.) I'm still planning on asking to be surprised. The thing is, He's going to surprise me whether I ask for it or not. So I might as well invite them with a smile and a blog than wince and groan. We'll see... I leave for camp on Monday with Emily! YAY that we get to live together for 3 months!! Oh, prayer requests: 1) For my job at school next year, I have to leave camp early, which I knew, but I just got a phone call from my boss and he said it's super early - August 11th! Camp's not even over til the 27th!! I really don't want to leave that early... it makes me so sad. Do I just can the job? Or leave camp willingly? I don't want to do either. So pray for that... and 2) I'm wondering about going to Mexico this summer on a mission trip w/Hannah. But if I leave camp so early in August, there's no way I'll take another week off midsummer for Mexico! Uh-uh. I just can't. So if I have to leave so early, I can't go to Mexico. And that bums me out. And 3) Things w/Houser are just so up in the air. It feels so good to just lay them out in the hands of the Lord. But I am just such a control freako... I want to know where stuff is going. I just pray my heart will be ok with a goal of friendship. I don't think it has to be stagnantly ok with that goal, but to start out rebuilding a relationship I think it should be a goal of friends. And that's hard for me.

I should go tackle this room. It will feel so great to come home to a nice clean me space... but getting there is no fun! I hate this job. But "give thanks continuously" rings in my head. Thank you God for choosing me!! :)

monday

2005-05-03T00:38:00.000-05:00

Today's surprise was remembering how much fun having fun is! Confusing and simple, I know. But it's true. I hold back a lot, I'm finding out, and tonight just to let loose was great. We had the semi-annual late night breakfast, and ResLife hosted it. The theme was Wild West, and Hannah and I dressed up. Went all out cowgirl style. At first, I was just so uncomfortable and ugly feeling, I wasn't even excited at all to go anymore. But we left, and a few minutes after getting there I felt so much better. Funny thing - how God gives you the chance to control your mood and attitude. Surprise. =) Anyways, it was fun. We danced, and to just be girly with my friends and see fun people in the caf and listen to country music was plain old fun. It reminded me (a snippet) of how much fun reveling in the love of Jesus is. I forget how treasured and cherished and real and surprising His love is, when you let it be. I forget to let Him lead so often, and then when He takes the reins, I'm surprised at how great it is to just let go and be led. Gives me room to dance and be girly and just be His princess daughter. I love it! So I'm going to make puppy chow for my studying girls... I'm going to miss my floor this summer and next year. Anyways, time to spread the surprises! Till later...

quick surprise

2005-04-30T11:38:00.000-05:00

Back again! Last night was a surprise. I went to talk to Kev, and ran into one of his residents. I proceeded to have a 2 hour conversation about the Lord with this guy. He is so so so close, you guys!! It's so hard to be patient... but it's amazing to see how the Lord is chasing him. What a crazy thing - that the Creator would be in such pursuit of us. Amazing!! More later, i just wanted to jot down a reminder that YOU are being chased and sought after by a holy pursuer!! :)

uff da...

2005-04-28T16:25:00.000-05:00

Well, that'll teach me to say things like "I'm going to write every day!" Oops. Sorry all! It has been an amazing couple of weeks. One thing that's been funny and surprising is to realize that God hears us. When I actually take time and am intentional in prayer, honestly seeking Him, He answers. Catches me off guard every time. How is it that the Starmaker, the Master Craftsman, knows me by name, listens to me, and considers me His favorite - His prized one, His bride? What a crazy God!! I think I'll just start listing surprises from the past two-ish weeks. Here we go!
1) A couple months ago, I went to Myrtle Beach on a spring break trip w/some pretty sweet people. I was convicted when I was down there of becoming more involved in a ministry called Campus Outreach. CO takes a summer trip to Myrtle Beach, and does intense ministry and evangelism training. It was laid on my heart to think about going, which was the first surprise about the whole deal. The ministry itself was laid on my heart even more - just being aware of a desire to be involved, which was something new and a little scary. As the weeks unfolded, I prayed more and more about the summer. See, I'm supposed to go to camp again as the high school coordinator. It's all set - housing, the job, an internship with them... So Myrtle Beach would disrupt everything. I was praying so hard, and so often about it, and consulting people to see what they thought. Finally, I emailed my camp director. When he wrote back, he said that I couldn't hear God b/c I was supposed to choose between the two. It was up to me, he said. He told me to pray a "Jonah blessing" - God would make it impossible for me to choose wrong. (ps: now go read Jonah. It's amazing.) He said a ton of amazing things that blew me away with their accuracy, conciseness and timeliness. God just works through people, He truly does. Loooooooong story short, I chose camp. That was also a surprise. I had turned in my commitment papers to the beach project leaders, and the forms were at the church and everything! And then I called and asked if they could get them back. =) For me, the bigger leap of faith is to go to camp. There are a lot of reasons for this (I'm not going to list them, but if you want details im or email me). The biggest reason is the way my heart feels. So content and peaceful and excited to go back to Luther Dell. I feel like the whole ordeal was a tiny little big like Abraham and Isaac. I wasn't sacrificing a child, but I think God wanted me to see that I could give everything up for Him. Beach project would've been giving up a lot - camp, friends, my family's feelings (they were not happy at all with the idea of project. That was really hard. Yay for Mark 10:35 - thank you Lord for choosing me!), time away from auggies, coming back for orientation, going a couple weddings, being visited by hannah and kev... yeah. It would've been a lot. Gosh, I feel like this little blurb doesn't do justice to all the searching I had to do in this. Seriously, it was such a weight on me. When I said outloud that I was going to camp, that I wasn't going to project, the weight just fell off. It was unreal. So that was big life surprise #1!
2) I'm learning so much about waiting on the Lord. Through that, I get to see His amazing, unsurpassable, ridiculous faithfulness. Houser's new obsession verse is 2Timothy 3, and he's rightfully obsessed with it. It's sweet - it says that God can't be unfaithful to us, b/c He'd be unfaithful to Himself if He were, and He can't disown Himself to be unfaithful. That's so sweet in so many ways. The obvious one is the measure of faithfulness that He posesses. The fact that our Lord CANNOT be unfaithful to us blesses my heart. I am never abandoned, I am never forgotten, I am never left behind. And that He says that if He's unfaithful to us, it'd be like Him being unfaithful to Himself. He made us in the image of Him that is I Am. How special are we?!
3) I got to give a senior chapel talk - a surprise in itself! And it went perfectly - just as I'd wanted ever since freshman year. Chapel talks are a big deal at Augsburg. The best surprises were twofold. First, realizing how badly I need to be convicted of the words I preach. They are never empty words - I really honestly and truly want people to know how special and priceless they are the the God of wonders. But I realize how often I forget. Two, my family came - my dad, bro and sis, and grandparents! To have a chance to share the gospel with them in words was amazing and humbling. Humbling b/c I realized that I'd never done that. Stupid! I really loved speaking. Maybe I could be a pastor someday. =)
I'll quit the novel for now. Those are pretty much the biggies. Maybe I'll write more later. Til then, be surprised!

Day 9 - Tuesday the 12th

2005-04-13T00:37:00.000-05:00

Tonight's surprise was at FCA. Wong organized it and I was nervous. But it was great! The mission trippers shared about the trip to Philly over spring break, and Wong had put together a slide show that had awesome scripture references, and several gave testimonials. It rocked. A nice surprise! But a yucky one for myself... cause I was reminded of how judgmental I am. And that's stinky. Maybe more later. Til then... be surprised!

Day 8 - Monday the 11th

2005-04-12T00:31:00.000-05:00

Happy Monday! I'm going to be good this week and write daily. It occurred to me that maybe I should feel weird, broadcasting my Jesus surprises to the world. But this "journal" is really an accountability device for me. Anyways... last night I had a really good chat time w/Cara. I was surprised at myself - my ability to think and just run and function off rationale and not just raw emotion. That's something new, and I like it. I feel joyful, and when I don't feel un-joyful (when it's not warranted, like just being crabby), it really feels wrong. I like learning about different ways God made me, and different little quirks He wired me with. It's scary and fun and all sorts of things to learn about your Maker, and how He made you! That was my big surprise today.

catching up

2005-04-11T18:43:00.000-05:00

Wow, so much for writing every day! In my defense, blogger was down for a couple days. Other than that, I've got nothing. Sorry! Pretty sure this is going to be a big entry (cut me some slack, it'll be a week's worth all in one!). Here we go!
Day 3 - Wednesday the 6th
Today had a few huge surprises. First, late Tuesday night Hannah and I got to have some confession Jesus time, which was so good for my heart. We struggle with envy - but Jesus makes it cool. Instead of letting it fester, we confess and talk about it, and He lets us use that envy to push each other and ourselves to grow. It's pretty sweet how He takes ugly and makes it beauteous. I love that. The next surprise was that I got a tattoo today!! =) That was a big surprise. Amy and Foof, don't tell mom!! I'll tell her myself. Hannah and I got the alpha and omega signs on our feet (mine on my right, hannah's on her left). I've been drawing that on my foot since July, and now it's just not going to come off! yay! We went with some wrestlers, and what surprised me was how they saw my faith, even amidst me. Know what I mean? I'd never met them before (they knew Hannah), and later I found out that one of them commented on my Jesusness. He called me a bible banger! I laughed. Yay if he saw JC! It just surprises me that He's evident in me. I forget that He calls us vessels, we pray to be vessels, and we are promised to be walking houses for the power of God. So anyway, the surprise was that even when I don't feel it at all, Jesus is bigger than me. yay! The Jericho walk that night was awesome. 6 of us prayed over Anderson Hall. I got an email from my amazing camp director that spoke directly to my heart, which was so weary. Surprise - God's faithful to us! He will be heard, even through emails! So overall, a surprising and full day.
Day 4 - Thursday the 7th
Today God woke me up! Just in time for class... He's my favorite alarm clock. Then on a test I thought I bombed, I got a perfect and my prof wrote "Excellent!" Now that's what I call a divine surprise!! =) I got to talk to Laura, and that was an unexpected blessing. God's got this thing where He lines up my heart w/Laura's, and then we can share them. It rocks! Jenna gave her chapel talk, and I cried. That wasn't surprising, I cry at everything. The surprises waited mostly til the FCA meeting that night. We met for 2 hrs - the longest mtg. this year. And people brought honesty to the table, something that's been so missing and needed all year. We elected new officers for next year, and I burst into tears! I am just going to miss Jeremiah and Hannah so much, and it just hit me as we were praying our new pres in that they won't be there. I'm really scared of doing FCA alone. I just had a bunch of unexpected revelations that night, and it was hard. Another surprise to come out of that was an invite to watch a movie w/houser after the meeting. I did (Eriks too). I don't know what to make of this whole deal... I've been just longing and praying for God to make His will known to me. Oh, another surprise - I got an email from a dude about the Jericho walk. He wondered why we were doing it, and was worried b/c the real Jericho fell down. I told him that's just what we wanted! (I elaborated on that, don't worry) And when he wrote back, it was in support. It was a nice correspondance, and it was surprising because it was the first blatant support offered from a skeptic. That was awesome.
Day 5 - Friday the 8th
Today we (Eriks, houser, tony, kasi and Jeremiah!) went on a lockin, and it was awesome!!! We've done lockins at this church twice before, so some of the kids knew us. One girl came up to me, handed me a hair binder and said, "Here! This is yours from last year!" How surprised was I?! We just had a blast - playing games all night, making jewlery, eating junk food... I think the Jesus surprise came in the form of me. I just got to be myself - fully. It was so great, just being mostly who God intended me to be. I loved it.
Day 6 - Saturday the 9th
I didn't do much today, that's for sure. =) I think what surprised me was finding out how my jealousy and human-ness can just flare up out of nowhere. It happened tonight, and looking back I see how dumb it was. But the better surprise was finding out how hope does the same flareup trick. When I felt jealous and icky, all it took was one comment and my heart leaped. We're pretty fickle beings. Another surprise was realizing how bad I am at seeking out my Lord. He wants to be sought! And I just sit back and be lazy, letting Him seek me. I want to seek Him - I want to know His heart like Anna in the bible did! It's no coincidence I'm named for her. God grant and maintain a heart desirous for you alone! Be my obsession!!
Day 7 - Sunday the 10th
Today felt yucky. I wasn't looking for God at all. I was lazy and I felt like the definition of slothful. I didn't like it, but it sure was a surprise. It was so back and forth too - loved Sunday school, didn't particularly enjoy the sermon during the service. Wasn't motivated to do any work, but wasn't happy being lazy either. Adored my Father during Vespers, cried at Perkins afterwards. I felt crazy!! I know I'm an emotional person, but come on... I realized the surprise as I was looking down at my feet through my tears, and I saw the alpha and omega. No matter my mood, my actions, my words - God remains faithful, loving, enough. And I want to revel in that enoughness - not only is He enough for me, He's way way more than enough. It's so easy to forget though... which stinks. Guess the surprises just promised to come; they didn't say they'd be fun.

Day 2

2005-04-06T14:06:00.000-05:00

So yesterday was day 2 of this experiment. I started out the day hesitant to ask God for surprises. Sometimes it's really hard and scary to let go and just entrust even one whole day to Him. Stupid, but true. So He showed up uninvited! Gotta love it when JC barges in... guess that's what I'm asking Him to do. Yesterday was also day 2 of the Jericho walk here at Augsburg. Boy is it evident that Satan doesn't want this to happen! The leaders of the walk were just feeling yucky yesterday - my heart was heavy, my body was tired, my brain was mush. I just felt ick about myself, about others, about the walk and FCA... just no good. So I go to FCA, and am racing around setting up the relays, and I realize that I can just take a moment and breathe. So I did. And then I just laughed for the next 2 hours as we did relays in a "cloud of witnesses, spurring one another on in encouragement..."! It was great, but after, when Jeremiah asked me if I'd been surprised that day, I had to say no. That made me sad - was I even looking to be surprised? Not really.

And that's usually when God shows up - when we realize that we don't want Him to, even if we're asking. I went to the Jericho walk and prayed with the 7 others who were there to lift up Augsburg. Surprise #1: I ended up praying up Mort as Housers' partner, and it was such an unexpected blessing. I forget that there's a reason I miss him so much; he's amazing!

The whole group then met up and we joined in prayer for the 13th floor (the campus ministry floor). When we stepped onto that floor, it was so crazy; I was just able to breathe easier. The air just felt lighter, and my attitude and heart reflected that lightness. That's the Spirit y'all!! To pray and say the Lord's prayer for them was empowering. This was where surprise #2 happened: Lauren confirmed my attacked feelings from the day, as she was feeling them too. So eat that satan - we totally called his bluff and instead of letting the yucky feelings take over our day and hearts, we got to use them to unite under the mighty arm of Jesus!

Surprise #3: Houser asked if I would be interested in having a "moment" night with him. It was exactly what my heart needed in two ways - to spend time with Jesus and him, and to hear my Lord speak straight to my heart thru these songs . We just sat and listened to these amazing messages of peace, hope, abundant love and mercy all night, til we fell asleep. Don't know if you're reading this Hous, but thanks for being my final surprise of the day. Til tomorrow...

Day 1

2005-04-04T15:22:00.000-05:00

Wow... so God's huge and faithful and His ears must be giganto to hear us asking Him for surprises cause He does hear! I've got a list a mile long of surprises He sent to me today! Starting with the Jericho walk... My friend Lauren and I are doing this Jericho walk this week, and have run into a lot of people who don't want it to happen. It's been pretty frustrating to be so unsupported by the "spiritual leaders" on campus, but it's a testament of how big the Lord is. Today, Lauren met with our pastors, who are very upset about the walk. They've asked us to change the time, change the things we're praying for, and to nix the whole thing. The meeting started out with these same ideas. But later, I got a phone call from Lauren that said the two pastors prayed with her for the walk, offered suggestions for it, and basically offerred some support. Praise His name! So last night there were 10 people who showed up to pray up our freshmen resident hall. Sweet! We prayed for each floor, and asked some individuals to pray with us. The joy that was resonating in my heart was overwhelming; JC was there pouring out over this dorm!! It was just amazing to feel Him so present and answering our requests for His mercy and peace to flood the hall.

That was probably the biggest JC surprise of the day. To ask for Him and to get Him... ahhhh. Sweet. There were other surprises too - a chance to volunteer at a senior citizen dinner and dance, a super fun outing to Ben & Jerry's with the other RA's, registration going so smoothly, wearing a cute skirt =), a guy from my Grace youth group sought me for counsel, I talked to an old friend for 4 hours (til 5am!!)... But as awesome all that felt, and for all the joy those people gave me, the joy from the Lord I felt as we lifted this hall made it all look like poop!! Sorry all, but it's the Truth! How great is HE?! Til tomorrow...

the night before day 1

2005-04-04T01:30:00.000-05:00

This is my very first blog, so forgive me if I ramble! I'm assuming that if you're reading this, you know who I am, but maybe that's not how these work! I'm Anna, a senior at Augsburg College in Minneapolis, MN. I went to church at the Upper Room tonight for the first time, and I am hooked. What a place of the spirit!! They are beginning a new series called Surprise Me, God! It's not just a study - it's a challenge. The challenge issued was intriguing - simply to pray 3 words every day: "Surprise me, God." The personal challenge God tacked onto that for me was to journal my surprises everyday. So here I am... :)

I'll try my best to keep these entries concise. That will not be easy for me (I'm a talker, especially about JC!), but I'll try! I'm praying for all you people from the upper room who are taking on this challenge. For open hearts, willing to receive holy surprises in any shape or form. For hearts that are moldable! For a positive mindset, constantly on the lookout for heavenly fingerprints on your days. For minds desirious of the Lord - that we would crave surprises from above. And most of all, that God would be faithful and hold to His promises for us to prosper. That we may know His plans are BEST - perfect for us! The way He puts the puzzle pieces of our lives together is amazing... what a creative and sweet God we have!! Praise to Him tonight and always - holla for JC!! Night all - blessings and prayers for your day 1's of surprise!